Coming Out to Your Parents

Science, the church, and even the government have been trying to come up with an explanation on how gays become gays. But for most homosexuals, this state is inborn and they believe that they do not have to adjust anything about themselves since everything that they are has been set. People, specifically straight conservative ones, wonder why gays "multiply by the second". It is their knowledge that gay people cannot in fact "give birth", then why do gay communities grow so fast? And no one can seem to stop this growth. This is happening because more and more gays are now coming out of their closets. Depending on the personality, gay people either rush out of the closet or try to find the 'perfect' time first, considering the people around specially their parents.

There are several questions that gay people consider before coming out to their parents. Like "Will my mom and pop accept the "real" me?" "What would be their reaction?" "Would they disown me?" or "What changes would occur when I come out?" These are just a few of the queries that alarms their thoughts and all of which are difficult to find answers unless they actually do the 'confession'. It might be a normal initial reaction for parents to either get surprised or shocked or even get angry when they hear the admission. Coming out to parents is just the start. And as time passes by, people would recognize how brave a gay person is by admitting their sexuality. These tips are in general and would definitely be a case to case basis. Equipping one's self with the information that the parents would need to hear when coming out of the closet would also be very helpful. But until then, try these tips when you are ready to tell your parents what they really need to know about you.

Tip number 1: Know who you are really close to. Some would say that mothers are more open to this kind of situation. However, it would really be of great help if you open up to which parent you are closer, so as to have a more comfortable talk.

Tip number 2: Make the atmosphere light yet steady. Try not to over introduce your confession. Some become very nervous and they tend to talk way too much until it goes out of hand or it becomes awkward, go straight to the point. Maybe having some wine with the parent (or parents if you are equally close to both) would help ease the tension.

Tip number 3: Do not involve anyone else, like a sibling or a friend. Having someone else with you when coming out to parents will build up stiffness and it might make your parent or parents anticipate more and more until they become anxious. You do not need any other emotions lurking when speaking about your issue.

Tip number 4: Do give them some assurance that being gay is not becoming a different person. It's just relaying your real emotions towards relationships and certain choices.

Tip number 5: If and when you are done with your speech and your parents' reaction is on the negative side, do not try pushing too hard, let them take their time to absorb what you have just said. On the other hand, if their reaction is on a positive note, thanking them is not enough, let them know that you really appreciate that they understand you.

Author: Roger Stewart "Taste My Rainbow."

View the original article here

Coming Out to Your Parents

Science, the church, and even the government have been trying to come up with an explanation on how gays become gays. But for most homosexuals, this state is inborn and they believe that they do not have to adjust anything about themselves since everything that they are has been set. People, specifically straight conservative ones, wonder why gays "multiply by the second". It is their knowledge that gay people cannot in fact "give birth", then why do gay communities grow so fast? And no one can seem to stop this growth. This is happening because more and more gays are now coming out of their closets. Depending on the personality, gay people either rush out of the closet or try to find the 'perfect' time first, considering the people around specially their parents.

There are several questions that gay people consider before coming out to their parents. Like "Will my mom and pop accept the "real" me?" "What would be their reaction?" "Would they disown me?" or "What changes would occur when I come out?" These are just a few of the queries that alarms their thoughts and all of which are difficult to find answers unless they actually do the 'confession'. It might be a normal initial reaction for parents to either get surprised or shocked or even get angry when they hear the admission. Coming out to parents is just the start. And as time passes by, people would recognize how brave a gay person is by admitting their sexuality. These tips are in general and would definitely be a case to case basis. Equipping one's self with the information that the parents would need to hear when coming out of the closet would also be very helpful. But until then, try these tips when you are ready to tell your parents what they really need to know about you.

Tip number 1: Know who you are really close to. Some would say that mothers are more open to this kind of situation. However, it would really be of great help if you open up to which parent you are closer, so as to have a more comfortable talk.

Tip number 2: Make the atmosphere light yet steady. Try not to over introduce your confession. Some become very nervous and they tend to talk way too much until it goes out of hand or it becomes awkward, go straight to the point. Maybe having some wine with the parent (or parents if you are equally close to both) would help ease the tension.

Tip number 3: Do not involve anyone else, like a sibling or a friend. Having someone else with you when coming out to parents will build up stiffness and it might make your parent or parents anticipate more and more until they become anxious. You do not need any other emotions lurking when speaking about your issue.

Tip number 4: Do give them some assurance that being gay is not becoming a different person. It's just relaying your real emotions towards relationships and certain choices.

Tip number 5: If and when you are done with your speech and your parents' reaction is on the negative side, do not try pushing too hard, let them take their time to absorb what you have just said. On the other hand, if their reaction is on a positive note, thanking them is not enough, let them know that you really appreciate that they understand you.

Author: Roger Stewart "Taste My Rainbow."

View the original article here

Dearest Mom and Dad - Telling Your Parents You Are Gay

Homophobia literally means a fear for homos, in this case homosexuals, but that is not what the word stands for in our culture. In our time homophobia refers to a range of negative attitudes against the LGBT community in its totality; it stands for discrimination, hate, aggression, dehumanization, fear, negativity and anger against us. Often these negative attitudes are based on urban myths like the idea that gay men will rape straight men or worse, molest small boys. The fact that most rapists and pedophiles are straight does not change anything; like all myths these ones are not interested in facts.

Hetero-phobia was coined by homophobes claiming that they are not against homosexuals as such but against a group of homosexuals that threaten their heterosexual society by asking for a few basic human rights. Asking for equal rights to get married in this perspective are threatening the existence of the heterosexual family and everything it stands for. Hetero-phobia is therefore just a silly term coined to use against basic rights for homosexuals.

Academically interesting as the definitions above might be, it is definitely not what this article is about - luckily not. This article is about the effect that the above have on the families involved.

Dearest Mom & Dad

I am writing you a letter because I want to say a lot of things before you start to ask me questions, get mad or start crying. Don't worry it is not something you did, nor is it something that I did, It is just something that happened and I am still trying to figure it out; I really hope you could help me with this.

Mom, Dad; I am gay.

I need you to stay calm, I really do. I have read everything I could lay my hands on about homosexuality. You could say that I am now an expert in the field, so let me tell you what I have found. Please give me a chance to tell you the whole story, but first, an introduction:

Firstly I want you to understand that this is not something you did. Mom you did not make me gay by being over protective and Dad you did not do it because you could not always be there. Dad, an extra football, cowboy clothes or course in mechanics would not have changed anything; not letting me help you in the garage is not the reason. Mom, teaching me to cook was not the reason; letting me help you in the kitchen when I did not want to help dad in the garage did not make any difference.

Secondly you need to understand that this is not something I did. It is not because I hang around with the wrong friends because friends can not make you gay. It is not because I was playing with girls as a kid or playing with the wrong boys when I got older. It is not because I went to the wrong places, stayed away from church or because I did not like the pastor.

Mom & dad, I am not gay because you or I did anything wrong; I was born this way. If you do want to blame someone for this, I guess you could blame God and no, I am not judging God or making fun about Him. I am just explaining to you that if God created me, then He created me like this; created me gay. I am also not angry at Him for this. I really enjoy being gay and I think it is because He made me like this that I enjoy it so much. I am really thanking Him for making me gay because I would not like to be anything else. All the people who really went into this topic will tell you that a person does not choose this; you are born gay.

Do you know how I know this to be true? I know this because I realized I was different long before I knew what homosexuality meant. I always liked boys more and when the boys started to like girls more, I still wanted to stick to boys. In the gym when the boys had to change their clothes, I could not stop staring. Do you remember in grade 8, when Joe stole his father's porno and we watched it on our television? All the boys went mad when they saw the first naked woman in that movie and I could not understand what they were raving about until the first naked man appeared; the moment I raved about him my friends looked at me as if I were mad. There is so many other stories I could tell you about this, but we can talk about them another day. All I wanted to show you were that I was gay before I even knew what being gay really meant.

I guess I could have made this easier for you by telling you face to face, but I was really too scared of what your reaction would be. Do you know how scary it is for a kid to ponder on the idea that his parents are going to throw him away? Do you know how scared I am at the idea of losing you, being rejected by you or never being able to be held by you? It is, without a doubt, the scariest thought a sixteen year old boy like me could ever have. I beg you to try and understand; I know how difficult it will be, but remember your acceptance of my sexuality will always be easier than the rejection the whole of mankind is going to put me through. Please do not reject me and please do not stop loving me. I promise you that if this were merely a choice, I would have never made it. Why on earth would anybody knowingly choose to be hated by 80% of the population?

Your loving gay son

(Luckily for me I never had to send a letter like this)

Andrew Blade is a founding member and sex-therapist at the Cobra group. His specialty is gay and lesbian sexology. You could read more of his articles on:

http://www.facebook.com/cobragay

or

http://www.cobrahelping.blogspot.com/

View the original article here

Coming Out to Your Parents

Science, the church, and even the government have been trying to come up with an explanation on how gays become gays. But for most homosexuals, this state is inborn and they believe that they do not have to adjust anything about themselves since everything that they are has been set. People, specifically straight conservative ones, wonder why gays "multiply by the second". It is their knowledge that gay people cannot in fact "give birth", then why do gay communities grow so fast? And no one can seem to stop this growth. This is happening because more and more gays are now coming out of their closets. Depending on the personality, gay people either rush out of the closet or try to find the 'perfect' time first, considering the people around specially their parents.

There are several questions that gay people consider before coming out to their parents. Like "Will my mom and pop accept the "real" me?" "What would be their reaction?" "Would they disown me?" or "What changes would occur when I come out?" These are just a few of the queries that alarms their thoughts and all of which are difficult to find answers unless they actually do the 'confession'. It might be a normal initial reaction for parents to either get surprised or shocked or even get angry when they hear the admission. Coming out to parents is just the start. And as time passes by, people would recognize how brave a gay person is by admitting their sexuality. These tips are in general and would definitely be a case to case basis. Equipping one's self with the information that the parents would need to hear when coming out of the closet would also be very helpful. But until then, try these tips when you are ready to tell your parents what they really need to know about you.

Tip number 1: Know who you are really close to. Some would say that mothers are more open to this kind of situation. However, it would really be of great help if you open up to which parent you are closer, so as to have a more comfortable talk.

Tip number 2: Make the atmosphere light yet steady. Try not to over introduce your confession. Some become very nervous and they tend to talk way too much until it goes out of hand or it becomes awkward, go straight to the point. Maybe having some wine with the parent (or parents if you are equally close to both) would help ease the tension.

Tip number 3: Do not involve anyone else, like a sibling or a friend. Having someone else with you when coming out to parents will build up stiffness and it might make your parent or parents anticipate more and more until they become anxious. You do not need any other emotions lurking when speaking about your issue.

Tip number 4: Do give them some assurance that being gay is not becoming a different person. It's just relaying your real emotions towards relationships and certain choices.

Tip number 5: If and when you are done with your speech and your parents' reaction is on the negative side, do not try pushing too hard, let them take their time to absorb what you have just said. On the other hand, if their reaction is on a positive note, thanking them is not enough, let them know that you really appreciate that they understand you.

Author: Roger Stewart "Taste My Rainbow."

View the original article here

How to tell parents that you're Gay-2 ideas for peace, if you're nervous

The human mind starts the most advanced tool for each experiment.

Gay relationships are similar to other people of interest. Friendship, parenthood, anger, joy, happiness, the daughter of a gay son gay, etc., all are living different situations.

It is not an easy task by any means to inform parents about it. Many become nervous, start, losing the peace, or even still do things on their back, but not without guilt feeling that I can't even address and to accept it.

Who is responsible here? Who to blame?

Cultural traditions, social atmosphere or lack of self-belief, they are possible here.

Evolution never stops at one point. Monumental size past reminds us that the future is always pushed to the highest standards is life. We are not here to decide for what is wrong or right. People must be for everyone. They have the right to life and the way they want to live like this.

There are ways to calm down nerves while attempting to publish it relative to its parents. Single element most influential in this process is called honesty. Must be a fair approach to things that we can, as such, as i did. Nobody is going to appreciate, even if you have done something good by them is not honest in the first instance. Medical Sciences published a little-known facts, on the basis of several studies that sexual orientation is not only the sum total for immediate needs, but are also many other things such as family, and is hard wired into our bodies at the time of birth. Now what? Who is at fault and start a conversation with?

A feeling of nervousness is common type obstacle encountered in, when people try to overcome the fear and uncertainty. The best solution is to run, feeling good about a general factor that the public authorities intend to publically address it by accepting it to parents. When we give our thoughts out, leaves us no other option but to stand in strong defence of his we indicate. Gay gay son or daughter is just another path taken by many of us. This feature definitely does not affect the mind sees it, socially awakened because the situation as another character changes and another sign of evolution. Since the first chapter at the time of the people is the planet of the whole journey has been marked by events which eventually became life support components. We knew he never would be, which as things unfold, and later when it was shown to us, we must simply accepted and appreciated the fact that we were at the fair.

Sexual behaviors or lifestyles deepens further bit Mystery. We can try to not walk in that direction would Become difficult to achieve otherwise any place common understanding. Our society has become a mirror's reflection individualistic personalities, which we can all survive. So it would be unfair to blame one person in particular for his own choices. We know that the characters would begin appearing on the surface, our understanding of ' natural ' and ' 'nienaturalnych ' or right and invalid means without any definition. Gay relationships belong to the same planet, which we can belong.

The Idea is to find the strength and start a conversation, like any other normal day activities. The next line of action is to obtain moral support partner. This is the most vital aspect of courage can defy and offset the momentum in balance. No sense in taking more than the usual time to sit and talk about it with their parents. The more delayed process: it could be moved to more of a challenge every day.

Already decided by the user. Is the least going to work more efficiently, if someone is standing with you or not as it is a matter of self respect and self-dignity. However, people close to you support the essential mental and at times turbulent.

The secret is in believing we are who we are and what now. Other thoughts beyond its's going to distract you and often causes worry and unnecessary damage.

Stressing the importance of the quality of entrepreneurial expression acontentwriter@yahoo.co.in
Rajan Dhir is the editor of the content. The only purpose is to provide solutions to his public writing. He is the author of a history of everyday approach to life. He specializes in content of freelance translation, writing services

View the original article here

Coming out to parents

Science, the Church and even the Government to try to die an explanation on how gays are gays. But for the majority of homosexuals, it is congenital and they believe that the need to adjust something about themselves, because everything that it has been set. Persons, in particular, the straight conservative plantation, wonder Why gay men "multiply by the second. Is their knowledge that gay people can't actually "confinement", then why are gay Communities grow so fast? And no one can seemingly do increases. This happens because more and more gay men are now coming from their distribution nodes. Depending on the personality of people gay rush out of the closet, or try to find the "perfect" time for the first time, taking people around specially of their parents.

There are several questions to consider before coming out gay people to their parents. Like "my mom and pop it" real "me?" "What would be their reaction?" "They Would disown me?" or "what changes would occur during the coming?" These are just a few queries that alarms thoughts and which are hard to find the answer, unless you actually are doing a "confession". This may be a normal reaction leading to the parents get surprised or shocked or even get angry during the song's release. Coming out to the parents are just the beginning. And during a time of transition, people would recognize as a gay person is courageous by admitting their homosexuality. These hints are generally i strongly would be to those cases. Equipping his Self-portrait saying that parents would need to hear you coming out of the closet would also be very helpful. However, by this time, by using the following tips when you are ready to tell their parents what they really need to know about you.

Tip 1: know who you are really close to. Some would say that mothers are more open to this type of situation. But really it would be very helpful if you're open to which parent the closer, so to specify a more comfortable conversation.

Tip number 2: Make the atmosphere light and have not yet been fixed. Try not to more than make your confession. Some become very nervous and have a say too much until it gets out of hand or becomes uncomfortable, go to the point. You might have some wine from the parent (or parents) if they are equally close to both, would help ease tensions,.

Tip # 3: do not include anyone else, such as sibling or friend. Having someone else with you when the stiffness of the approaching parents will build up and might cause a parent or parents anticipate more until they become anxious. You don't have to other emotions hidden while talking about email problem.

Tip 4: give them some confidence that is gay has not become a different person. Simply put Your true emotions towards relationships and one election.

Tip 5: if they are made with the speech and the reaction of your parents is the negative side, do not attempt, pushing too hard to let them take them to absorb what you have just said. On the other hand, if their response to the positive note, to thank them is not sufficient, let them know that you can really appreciate what you do understand.

Author: Roger Stewart "Taste My Rainbow."

View the original article here

My dear MOM and Dad-speaking parents are Gay

Homophobia literally means fear of homos, in this case homosexuals, but not as a word stands for in our culture. In our times homophobia refers to a range of negative attitudes towards the LGBT community in General; This means discrimination, hatred, aggression, dehumanization, fear, negative and anger against us. Often these negative attitudes are based on the urban myths like the idea that gay men straight men will rape or worse, molest young boys. The fact that most rapists and pedophiles are simple, does not change anything; As with all myths are not interested, these statements of facts.

Phobia of this decision was coined by homophobes, arguing that they are not against homosexuals as such but against a group of homosexuals, which threaten their moving society by asking some basic human rights. The questions on the equal right to get married in this perspective because the existence of the moving of the family and everything he stands for. This decision, this is why the silly phobia term use against basic rights for homosexuals.

Academically interesting because the definitions above may be, surely this article about-fortunately not. This article is about the effect that this had on the families involved.

My dear MOM and Dad

I am writing a letter because I want to, you can say many things before ask questions, get mad and start crying. Don't worry, this is something you do, nor is it something I did, is just something that happened and still I'm trying it; I hope really that can help in this.

Mom, Dad; I am gay.

I need you to remain calm if they really. I have read everything I could lay my hands on homosexuality. We can say that I am now an expert in the field, I know what I found. Please give me a chance for the whole article, but the first introduction:

First, I want you to understand that this is not just something. MOM, you did not make me gay, being over protective and Tata, it was not performed because the user cannot always be there. Dad, additional football, clothes, cowboy, or a course in mechanics would not have changed anything; not allowing me to help in the garage is not a reason. MOM, teach me to cook there was no reason; allowing me to help in the kitchen when the didn't help Dad in the garage did not make any difference.

Secondly, you should understand that this is not something that I did. Not happening I can lose friends erroneous since friends can not cause of gays. Not happening, and was playing tonight as a child, or playing with the wrong men, when I got older. It is not because I went to the wrong places outside of the Church either don't like pastor.

MOM and Dad, I'm not gay because you either did nothing wrong and; I was born this way. If you blame someone, guess could blame God, and no, I'm not judging God or making fun of him. I'm just explaining to you that if God created me, then he created me like this; created me gay. I'm also not mad at him for that purpose. I really enjoy being gay and I think that because me so that I enjoy so much. I'm really thanking him for making me gay because I don't want to be anything else. All of the people who actually went to this topic will show you that the person does not have this option; The birth of gay men.

Do you know how do I find this to be true? I know this because I noticed that I was different long before I knew what homosexuality meant. Always liked boys more, and when the band began as the girls more, I still wanted to embed boys. In the gym when the boys had to change their clothes, and I can't stop staring. Do you remember in grade 8 when his father Joe stole the porno and we observed in our TV? All boys had when they saw the first woman naked in this movie, and I don't understand what could have been raving about it until the first Naked Man; the point at which I raved about it my friends looked at me as if I were mad. There are so many other threads could tell you about this, but you're talking about another day. They were all I wanted to show that I was gay even before I knew what meant is gay.

I think I have made this easier, would it really be to face, but was too scared of what would be Your reaction. Do you know how Scary is the baby amused at the idea that intends to get rid of him, his parents? Do you know how scared that I'm losing you ", the idea being rejected by user or never are in a position held by the user? It is, without a doubt, scariest thoughts that sixteen-year-old boy as I ever could have. I I i try to understand; I know how difficult it will be, but remember, the acceptance of My reproductive will always be easier than the rejection of all humankind's going to be me. Please don't reject me and please don't stop loving me. I promise you that if this were merely a choice, I never would. Why on earth would anyone knowingly choose hated by 80% of the population?

Mrs. love gay son

(Fortunately for me I had to send the letter never edit)

Andrew Blades-founding Member and sex therapist on the Cobra group. His speciality is the sexology gays and lesbians. On could read more of his articles:

http://www.Facebook.com/cobragay

or

http://www.cobrahelping.blogspot.com/

View the original article here